The women

-How about you? Would you like to get a face lift in a jar?

-This is my face. Deal with it.

Someone once said when you don't know what to do, do nothing. 

It feels like someone kicked you in the stomach. It feels like your heart stopped beating. It feels like that dream, you know, the one where you're falling and you want so desperately to wake up before you hit the ground but it's all out of your control. You can't trust anything anymore, no one is who they say they are. You life is changed forever and the only thing to come out of the whole experience is no one will be able to break your heart like that again... And I wouldn't discuss this with any of your friends. They'll all want to help and before you know it, you'll be taking care of them instead of yourself. 

Ok, ok, alright. I appreciate all of you trying to help, I do, but please don't dissect and analyze every square inch of this right now! I can't take it! Just be there for me! Silently!

-This would be so much easier if I didn't love him. There should be a pill that you can take to make love go away.

-Why would you want to make love go away? It's hard enough to find it in the first place...

You know what I do when I have a problem? Before I go to sleep I tell myself I'm gonna wake up with the answer. And that does it, I do. You try it, go on upstairs and get a good night sleep and tomorrow morning it will all look better. 

Let me give you Leah Miller's secret to life: don't give a shit about anybody. Be selfish. Because once you ask yourself the question: "What about me?", everything changes for the better. I mean, after all, who are you? What do you want, Mary?